On Wednesday, President Bush vetoed the State Children’s Health Insurance Program (SCHIP), ostensibly because he considered it a banana peel on the already slippery slope to socialized medicine.
While true, that’s not the whole reason.
Although Bush may be too much of a gentleman to point it out, the fact is that the Democrats larded the bill up with so much pork and so many pet projects that Bush had no alternative. Here are some of more pungent items in the bill that recently bore the brunt of the President’s unforgiving veto pen:
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- Changing the program’s name to the Robert C. Byrd State Children’s Health Insurance Program.
- Bill of attainder for Rush Limbaugh.
- Research grant to investigate why chubby interns don’t do laundry after adulterous sexual encounters.
- Redesigning the dollar by replacing “In God We Trust” with “In Global Warming We Believe”.
- A program to raise awareness of which Senators served in Vietnam, with a goal that every American will have that knowledge seared… seared into their memories.
- Non-binding resolution stating “George Bush has bigger jug-headed monkey ears than the cover of Pink Floyd’s Relics“.
- A law banning restroom-based sting operations.
- Sense of the Senate resolution stating “we support the troops as long as they don’t kill or offend terrorists.”
- Declaring English to be America’s offical language, para Espanol oprima el numero dos.
- Free gin & hookers for any Senator whose last name ends with “ennedy”.
Sadly, the veto also quashed the formal declaration of Fred Thompson’s appointment to God-Emperor of America and All Her Conquered Territories, Both Those Fallen and Those Soon to be Toppled, but that’ll come up again in January of 2009, anyway.
//* Free gin & hookers for any Senator whose last name ends with “ennedy”.//
and a swimming lessons grant for all interns….
My heroes have always been cowboys
Go Dubya!
(And no, that’s not my webpage but I love it anyway.)
-Tax deferrments for those that keep their assets in freezers.
-Allows states with an ocean shoreline to have double the current electoral votes
(My dad swears there is something in the salt water to make the left so loony)
-Requiring all conservative talk radio be switched to HAM radio frequencies.
-Declared Folsom Street to be a national monument
As usual, Harvey spreads some education around while being somewhat snarky. The Bill of Attainder link was enlightening.
Passing that bill would have been a SCHIPwreck in the long run: more taxes for more government health care for the poor children of illegal aliens & homegrown slackers. For Reid to start spouting his “Bush hates poor kids!” mantra again tells me that he didn’t understand that there is still a substantial amount of of money available, just not the piggish increase that the Socialists wanted, an increase that would go less to “the children” than it would to fat salaries for additional state health care personnel. But apparently, that $5,000,000,000 increase that Bush proposed isn’t worth their time.
“We want more money, but not that money!”
It’s like that homeless dude who gets indignant when you offer to buy him some food instead of just giving him change.
“It sounded like, well, that thing that’s brown but not chocolate.”
“I thought it was SHIP. I never liked ships. Prefer planes myself.”