Nobody’s Perfect

Dear Ann Coulter,
Can we keep the Klezmer?
Love,
Laurence Simon

Daily John Edwards Fabulous Fact

john edwards fabulous.jpgThings John Edwards can’t walk through:
a) Walls
b) Particularly thick fog banks
Bonus Facts from Casper the Friendly Host:
Unable to pull it apart on his own, John Edwards must eat cotton candy with a spork.
John Edwards was hospitalized with a broken tibia when his CD-ROM drive opened into his leg without warning.
It took his new assistant a moment to understand what he meant when he hissed at her, “I was very clear, wasn’t I? I need ones with WINGS!”
An unknown feminine whisper was overheard on the candidate’s open mikes at the last Democratic debate, “Gawd, Obama makes me moist.” However, Hillary was drinking water at the time.

Hillary Clinton Terrible Truths

When people are around Hillary Clinton, they are told to under no circumstances make eye contact with her. It’s not because she’s an arrogant bitch, though; it’s because that will instantly turn you to stone. Also, she’s an arrogant bitch.

Daily Fred Thompson Fact

There will be no natural disasters during the Fred Thompson administration; the earth is too scared of him to pull that crap.