John Edwards uses an entire roll of toilet paper at once, since those perforations were obviously designed for Superman to tear.
Bonus facts from Anonomouse Reader:
John Edwards was breastfed… till he was 7.
John Edwards has to “go commando” when he wears white slacks, because his mom taught him that panty lines are undignified.
*John doesn’t have a sock drawer. The drawer below his dainties is filled with Legg eggs.
*John parts his hair with a water pik, as a plastic comb tends to harm his delicate scalp.
*John had a garage door opener installed on those heavy shower curtains.
*He also had the tiolet seat screwed down to avert those awkward midnight trips; until he heard Hillary might be coming to visit.
I have a friend whose little sister was weaned only after she went up to their mom and said:
“Give me boob NOW or you die”
Edwards just wasn’t butch enough to stand up to his mommy.
When Elizabeth mentioned to John Edwards that he had a camel toe, he thought his crow’s feet needed to be exfoliated.
John Edwards, “Hilery on estrogen” ?