John Edwards SWEARS that there’s no such thing as a “twist-off” bottlecap.
Bonus Fact from Silicon Valley Jim:
John Edwards sued his high school because he wasn’t permitted to perform “The Good Ship Lollipop” in the annual talent show, although really he was just pissed that he wouldn’t be able to wear his Shirley Temple costume.
He probably gets the vapors yanking the cork out of his Dom Perignon, however: I have been hearing a lot of rumors about this guy Edwards. I think we know how he opens his long neck Buds.
Horses sweat.
Men perspire.
Ladies glow.
John Edwards shimmers.
That was bad martin.
Repub’s are red,
Demo’s are blue,
Which state are you in?
John Edwards’ in you.
Just kidding…don’t throw that pie…
“although really he was just pissed that he wouldn’t be able to wear his Shirley Temple costume.”
Meh. I heard he ended up wearing that costume under his gown at graduation. Allegedly he also wore a tiara under his mortarboard, and had Mr. Bojangles ashes in his left sock.
John Edwards SWEARS that there’s no such thing as a “twist-off” bottlecap.
He uses more of a suction technique, and the reason he likes to wear short skirts isn’t just because he thinks he has “a ballerina’s legs.”
“That was bad martin.”
Yeah, I know, “shimmers luxuriously” would have worked better.
But, dammit, he went ahead and glued bottle caps onto his dress shoes anyways.
That’s because Elizabeth removes the caps for him when she makes his lunch…right after she cuts the crust off his sandwich.
I think we know how he opens his long neck Buds.
Do you really think that John Edwards has been anywhere near a beer (even counting Budweiser as a beer)?
Yes, SV Jim I believe he has consumed some beer. I have seen that he has children. I have also seen his wife. Either he tilted a brew or broke out the brown paper bag. Something tells me she would have kicked his ass if he slipped a poke over her head.