If someone doesn’t comment on here at all, does that automatically make them gay, or what?
Since I can’t ask that without commenting, I’ll go ahead and add that I am not, nor ever have been, homosexual. Just in case.
tap-tap tap-TAP-TAP-TAP
TAP-tap-TAP-TAP-TAP
TAP-TAP-tap-tap-TAP-TAP-tap-TAP-TAP
Little did we know that Sen. Craig was actually tapping “I am not gay” in Morse Code.
Here was a great man. He built bridges all over the U.S. People used to call him the greatest bridgebuilder of all time. But tap the wrong persons foot and they don’t call you bridgebuilder anymore….
“tap-tap tap-TAP-TAP-TAP
TAP-tap-TAP-TAP-TAP
TAP-TAP-tap-tap-TAP-TAP-tap-TAP-TAP Little did we know that Sen. Craig was actually tapping “I am not gay” in Morse Code.”
LMAO.. Good one!
I’m not gay, but my friend thought his roommate was:
“Dude, I think my roommate’s gay.”
“Really? What makes you say that?”
“I dunno, just a impression I get from him. Well, that and also because his d**k kinda tastes like ass…”
OK OK sorry, everybody. Someone was gonna say it eventually.
I am not now, nor have I ever been a Democrat.
(There. That should have me covered for not being gay, a murderer, a thief, a terrorist, a Communist, a socialist, an idiot, a Klansman, ….)
I’ll tell you who’s not gay… Richard Jewell… the man saved countless lives on July 27, 1996 when he spotted a suspicious package in Centennial Olympic Park in Atlanta… his quick actions made him a hero, but an overzealous press made him a villain… thankfully, his name was finally cleared, but the damage had already been done… he was found dead in his home about 50 miles southwest of Atlanta today, a little over one year after the state of Georgia finally recognized him as a hero… what happened to him was nothing short of criminal, regardless of the fact that his name was ultimately cleared
I am not now, nor have I ever been, nor have I ever contemplated being, nor have I ever had a stray though about being, nor have I had sexual contact with someone who was, nor have I had very much Friendly contact with someone who was gay.
And the media that slandered the man who was trying to defend his state, nation and citizen’s of other countries attending the games are super-duper, 3 wangs in every orifice, assless chaps and a leather vest with a biog bushy beard and super hairy Robin Williams Body Hair Gay.
And for their slander, they should be stomped by some pissed off rednecks from the very state this hero helped defend.
I read about that. He went on to be in law enforcement after that whole Olympic debacle. I guess he was suffering from kidney failure, and if it was related to alcoholism, who could blame him? They shoulda taken pussy-ass Eric Rudolph’s kidneys & given them to Jewell.
I bet Jewell wasn’t gay, either. Here’s hoping God’s giving him a hi-5 for a job well done.
I don’t think it’s right to call Senator Craig Gay, What you should say is he likes to have sex in public bathrooms with men. It’s just like Political correctness isn’t fascism.
…from Georgia, went to a few events in ’96 after the bombing, and heard his former attorney, Lin Wood, speak during my first year of law school… It needed to be pointed out, and I was more than happy to do it
I’m not gay, never have been gay, never will be gay, never had the slightest gay thought in my entire life, never will have the slightest gay thought in my entire life…EVER!!!
Whoa…
I’m glad I got here when I did-
I AM NOT GAY! I HAVE NEVER BEEN GAY!
(I think the ‘Hippies Smell’ T-shirt girl is a cutie)
Now stop looking at me funny.
I am not gay, although I have been known to occasionally wear purple and be seen around triangles.
One day at Utah State University, the gay and lesbian club declared a particular day to be Wear Jeans In Support Of Gays day, hoping that the apathetic, normally jeans-wearing students would be tricked into supporting gays. I happened to be teaching class that day. When I walked into class, I’d never seen so many pairs of khakis outside of the Gap.
I am not gay.
Unless Angelina or Charlize tell me to be, then I would..for a little while…just for them.It would be OK cause everyone else would if they had the chance.And I am talking Angelina from several years ago, when she had some meat on her.
I am not gay, although I could care less whether or not someone else is gay either, as long as they don’t throw their sex life in my face.
But that goes for just about anyone straight or gay.
I don’t want to know that your wife wants it four times a week.
I don’t want to know that you have the hots for the 16 year old babysitter (unless said sitter is my daughter, then you will meet Mr 12 gauge)
I don’t want to know that my neighbor likes to have his wife dress up like Smurfette so he can live out his Gargemell fantasy.
I don’t want to know if my coworker has a thing for midget amputee sheep.
And I don’t want to know if Adam prefers Steve to Eve.
I DON’T GIVE A (PINKEYTOE) ABOUT YOUR SEX LIFE
leave me out of it.
Good one # 40. I agree with #50. Discussion of one’s sex life in public is disgusting and really rather boring.
I was born before it was fashionable to be gay, so I never did it though someone once told me this really cute guy I dated (only a couple of times) was gay. That was enough to cure me from liking him cuz the guy he supposedly liked was a lot cuter than me.
I think it’s disgusting to think of a congressman in a public bathroom tapping out tunes. From now on when I use a public restroom, my legs will be tight together and I refuse to pick up anything that falls on the floor. (I do wonder how many times I’ve accidentally sent messages that I didn’t even know were messages!)
“I AM NOT GAY! I HAVE NEVER BEEN GAY!
(I think the ‘Hippies Smell’ T-shirt girl is a cutie)”
Dude you are so f’ing Queer! The “I Survived Row vs. Wade” T-shirt babe is so so much hotter. I mean hello…ultra low Hiphuggers?? Need I say more?
I’m not gay. But I do feel pretty and witty!
I once dated a guy who turned out to be gay. I don’t know if he was already leaning that way or if I had something to do with it. I think he was already leaning that way actually (I hope). He was a model (that should have been clue #1, eh?).
I’m a gay man trapped in a woman’s body … except with less lisping, whining, or bright sparkly things. Also I have more curves. And I don’t color-coordinate everything. Or scream when I see a spider. And I hate shopping. And…
Okay, FINE! I’m a straight woman!
I am not gay. But you probably thought so, cause I was so late to the party.
I admit to owning a pink shirt. But I’m colorblind and thought it was grey.
Well, heck… I’d better confirm my non-gayness before I end up post # 69. I eat barbecue, with no girlie sauces (since this is TX), listen to Johnny Cash, and shave with sandpaper. OK, maybe shaving with sandpaper is a little gay.
Gosh, I dunno… I think tag-team Hippies Smell and I Survived Roe vs Wade T-shirt girls is the real man’s, non-gay way to handle that dilemma.
Not gay, unless you mean happy. I’ve been happily married for 12 years, but I have to say “happily” because if I said “gayishly” married for 12 years, then people would probably jump to the wrong conclusion, since gay marriages are (thankfully) banned and all…
Know a few queers, but as long as they don’t look at me “that way” then we’re fine. Otherwise, they get punched square in the face.
69–HITTING FROM THE RED TEES IS A REFERENCE TO GOLF COURSES HAVING TWO PLACES TO TEE OFF–ONE FOR MEN AND ONE CLOSER TO THE GREEN FOR THE (WEAKER) WOMEN (I BELIEVE–I DON’T GOLF)
Sen Craig is not gay. If he was the Dems and Media would be saying how awful it is that he is being persecuted.
For myself I am not gay, but I do encourage it in other men. More women for me!!!
I’m not John Edwards and I’ve never been John Edwards.
I’m openly heterosexual and sorry for slobbering over your wife.
…
AGH! STOP THE IMPURE THOUGHTS! brb, self-flogging.
Straight – always have been, always will be.
I served in Vietnam!
As the first fortunate and well used favorite of my Benevolent Overlord Kal El, I can declare my non-gayness from the rooftops.
Matty G beat me to it. But yeah, I’m not now, nor have I ever been, gay. Unless you mean happy. I’ve been happy. But not gay like homosexual.
i’m not gay, but john edwards is a faggot.
Yeah, Matty, well, I never knew John Edwards and I ain’t no Jack Kennedy!
I am a lesbian trapped in a man’s body, but I don’t think that counts as being gay, does it?
I once had a serious crush on a lesbian…not sure if that makes me gay or not.
If someone doesn’t comment on here at all, does that automatically make them gay, or what?
Since I can’t ask that without commenting, I’ll go ahead and add that I am not, nor ever have been, homosexual. Just in case.
not gay, but I’m really into fashion and shopping…
but wait!! I’m a girl! I can be into fashion! yay!
I’m not gay, but I do have a wide stance.
I’m not gay or nothin’, but I think unicorns kick ass!
Cowboy, Jon.
I’m not gay, I just appear that way next to Fred Thompson.
You’d better not even imply that I’m gay or I’ll thcratch your eyeth out.
I’m not gay, but some of my frie…, actually, none of my friends are either.
tap-tap tap-TAP-TAP-TAP
TAP-tap-TAP-TAP-TAP
TAP-TAP-tap-tap-TAP-TAP-tap-TAP-TAP
Little did we know that Sen. Craig was actually tapping “I am not gay” in Morse Code.
I did not have sex with that woman, er, John Edwards.
Here was a great man. He built bridges all over the U.S. People used to call him the greatest bridgebuilder of all time. But tap the wrong persons foot and they don’t call you bridgebuilder anymore….
I’m not gay but I am willing to learn. Will they send me someplace special?
I am not now, nor have I ever been, a member of the homosexual-American community
I’m not gay although I was propositioned on multiple occasions by many -um- UnChuckNorris types while living in Brazil for 2 years.
I’m so old that I used to think that a “coming out party” was to celebrate a hermit’s change of heart.
“tap-tap tap-TAP-TAP-TAP
TAP-tap-TAP-TAP-TAP
TAP-TAP-tap-tap-TAP-TAP-tap-TAP-TAP
Little did we know that Sen. Craig was actually tapping “I am not gay” in Morse Code.”
LMAO.. Good one!
I’m not gay, but my friend thought his roommate was:
“Dude, I think my roommate’s gay.”
“Really? What makes you say that?”
“I dunno, just a impression I get from him. Well, that and also because his d**k kinda tastes like ass…”
OK OK sorry, everybody. Someone was gonna say it eventually.
I brought a lesbian back to the right side of the fence in less than four hours.
What does that tell ya?
I once tapped my foot in a restroom – does that count?
WAL: was that you trying to foot-diddle me?
I’m not gay, but what’s wrong with a little entirely hetero bathroom foot diddling? Heh.
I’m not gay. I’m gray, but that’s not quite the same thing, I hope.
I am not now, nor have I ever been a Democrat.
(There. That should have me covered for not being gay, a murderer, a thief, a terrorist, a Communist, a socialist, an idiot, a Klansman, ….)
I am not gay. In fact, I’m going to go home and do… uh… stuff… to Katie’s… penis.
Fred Thompson refers to me as Sir Mister_Cantankerous Sir. So what does that tell ya?
I’ll tell you who’s not gay… Richard Jewell… the man saved countless lives on July 27, 1996 when he spotted a suspicious package in Centennial Olympic Park in Atlanta… his quick actions made him a hero, but an overzealous press made him a villain… thankfully, his name was finally cleared, but the damage had already been done… he was found dead in his home about 50 miles southwest of Atlanta today, a little over one year after the state of Georgia finally recognized him as a hero… what happened to him was nothing short of criminal, regardless of the fact that his name was ultimately cleared
I am not now, nor have I ever been, nor have I ever contemplated being, nor have I ever had a stray though about being, nor have I had sexual contact with someone who was, nor have I had very much Friendly contact with someone who was gay.
And the media that slandered the man who was trying to defend his state, nation and citizen’s of other countries attending the games are super-duper, 3 wangs in every orifice, assless chaps and a leather vest with a biog bushy beard and super hairy Robin Williams Body Hair Gay.
And for their slander, they should be stomped by some pissed off rednecks from the very state this hero helped defend.
I read about that. He went on to be in law enforcement after that whole Olympic debacle. I guess he was suffering from kidney failure, and if it was related to alcoholism, who could blame him? They shoulda taken pussy-ass Eric Rudolph’s kidneys & given them to Jewell.
I bet Jewell wasn’t gay, either. Here’s hoping God’s giving him a hi-5 for a job well done.
BTW, thanks for bringing that up, Gunz. It needed to be said.
I don’t think it’s right to call Senator Craig Gay, What you should say is he likes to have sex in public bathrooms with men. It’s just like Political correctness isn’t fascism.
…from Georgia, went to a few events in ’96 after the bombing, and heard his former attorney, Lin Wood, speak during my first year of law school… It needed to be pointed out, and I was more than happy to do it
I’m not gay, never have been gay, never will be gay, never had the slightest gay thought in my entire life, never will have the slightest gay thought in my entire life…EVER!!!
ROTFFLMAOYFB!
You mean like flaming ?
More like dying.
Whoa…
I’m glad I got here when I did-
I AM NOT GAY! I HAVE NEVER BEEN GAY!
(I think the ‘Hippies Smell’ T-shirt girl is a cutie)
Now stop looking at me funny.
I am not gay, although I have been known to occasionally wear purple and be seen around triangles.
One day at Utah State University, the gay and lesbian club declared a particular day to be Wear Jeans In Support Of Gays day, hoping that the apathetic, normally jeans-wearing students would be tricked into supporting gays. I happened to be teaching class that day. When I walked into class, I’d never seen so many pairs of khakis outside of the Gap.
I am not gay.
Unless Angelina or Charlize tell me to be, then I would..for a little while…just for them.It would be OK cause everyone else would if they had the chance.And I am talking Angelina from several years ago, when she had some meat on her.
I an not gay. But I was hit on by a gay man once.
I am not gay, although I could care less whether or not someone else is gay either, as long as they don’t throw their sex life in my face.
But that goes for just about anyone straight or gay.
I don’t want to know that your wife wants it four times a week.
I don’t want to know that you have the hots for the 16 year old babysitter (unless said sitter is my daughter, then you will meet Mr 12 gauge)
I don’t want to know that my neighbor likes to have his wife dress up like Smurfette so he can live out his Gargemell fantasy.
I don’t want to know if my coworker has a thing for midget amputee sheep.
And I don’t want to know if Adam prefers Steve to Eve.
I DON’T GIVE A (PINKEYTOE) ABOUT YOUR SEX LIFE
leave me out of it.
Damn, Jimmy that was too many letters. I am not gay. I have never been gay. I am too busy to even think of a funny saying right now.
Good one # 40. I agree with #50. Discussion of one’s sex life in public is disgusting and really rather boring.
I was born before it was fashionable to be gay, so I never did it though someone once told me this really cute guy I dated (only a couple of times) was gay. That was enough to cure me from liking him cuz the guy he supposedly liked was a lot cuter than me.
I think it’s disgusting to think of a congressman in a public bathroom tapping out tunes. From now on when I use a public restroom, my legs will be tight together and I refuse to pick up anything that falls on the floor. (I do wonder how many times I’ve accidentally sent messages that I didn’t even know were messages!)
I’m not gay… not that there’s anything wrong with that
ING, INHBG.
“I AM NOT GAY! I HAVE NEVER BEEN GAY!
(I think the ‘Hippies Smell’ T-shirt girl is a cutie)”
Dude you are so f’ing Queer! The “I Survived Row vs. Wade” T-shirt babe is so so much hotter. I mean hello…ultra low Hiphuggers?? Need I say more?
Wait a minute. If you’re a lesbian trapped in a man’s body, can you hit from the red tees?
I’m not gay. But I do feel pretty and witty!
I once dated a guy who turned out to be gay. I don’t know if he was already leaning that way or if I had something to do with it. I think he was already leaning that way actually (I hope). He was a model (that should have been clue #1, eh?).
I CAN HAZ STRATE!!1!
I’m a gay man trapped in a woman’s body … except with less lisping, whining, or bright sparkly things. Also I have more curves. And I don’t color-coordinate everything. Or scream when I see a spider. And I hate shopping. And…
Okay, FINE! I’m a straight woman!
I am not gay. But you probably thought so, cause I was so late to the party.
I admit to owning a pink shirt. But I’m colorblind and thought it was grey.
Ummm… rats.
I waited so long before posting that you probably all think I’m gay now. Don’t tell the wife and kids.
I am not gay!!….. but I did stay at a Holiday Inn last night.
Well, heck… I’d better confirm my non-gayness before I end up post # 69. I eat barbecue, with no girlie sauces (since this is TX), listen to Johnny Cash, and shave with sandpaper. OK, maybe shaving with sandpaper is a little gay.
Gosh, I dunno… I think tag-team Hippies Smell and I Survived Roe vs Wade T-shirt girls is the real man’s, non-gay way to handle that dilemma.
I am not gay, and never have been gay.
also,
I am armed, and never have been un-armed. So no monkeying with this comment, y’hear Ed?
khart208:
I’m intrigued by your tag-team idea. I’d throw in the ‘Ice Cold Conservative’ girl too.
I’m not gay and never have been gay.
Thought I might’ve been a lesbian, if I had been born a girl.
I’m NOT gay!!! Even though I’ve forgotten what sex is like. That doesn’t make me gay does it??
(I’m married w/child)
Though
can you hit from the red tees?
What the heck does that mean?
Now I’m all depressed, I’ve had a wide stance my whole life but I never realized I was gay because of that.
Not gay, unless you mean happy. I’ve been happily married for 12 years, but I have to say “happily” because if I said “gayishly” married for 12 years, then people would probably jump to the wrong conclusion, since gay marriages are (thankfully) banned and all…
Know a few queers, but as long as they don’t look at me “that way” then we’re fine. Otherwise, they get punched square in the face.
NOPE. NEVER BEEN THERE, NEVER DONE THAT.
69–HITTING FROM THE RED TEES IS A REFERENCE TO GOLF COURSES HAVING TWO PLACES TO TEE OFF–ONE FOR MEN AND ONE CLOSER TO THE GREEN FOR THE (WEAKER) WOMEN (I BELIEVE–I DON’T GOLF)
I am gay, and I’ve always been gay. I am not a Democrat, nor a Hippy, although I’ve got a few tiedyed shirts.
Sen Craig is not gay. If he was the Dems and Media would be saying how awful it is that he is being persecuted.
For myself I am not gay, but I do encourage it in other men. More women for me!!!
Yes, I am happy most of the time.
But, thank God, I’m not QUEER! Oh, pardon me I meant to say FAG!